Wednesday, September 12, 2007

buss aik post

It`s been sometime since I wrote something in my blog. I really do not understand the reason why I used to write or why I am not writing anymore. Kia abhi life bilkul bhi worthwhile nahi hai? Kia abhi aisa kuch bhi nahi horeha jo mai blog k through save kerna chahoun?

Koi 1.5 month pehlay mai Pakistan gya tha, cousin ki shadi thi and waise bhi gher jana tha... Acha reha trip, laiken strangely I did not enjoy as much as I used to enjoy earlier, jab mai UK say Pakistan jaya kerta tha, I did try not to look different, I tried my best to blend in and have a good time, laiken ager internally I asses it, it was probably all fake. Maine buht sochnay ki koshish ki k what would be the reason behind? I am Home! and with my Family, and on a occasion, it should be all jolly and humorous, laiken phir bhi.. pata nahi shaed yeh year hi kuch aisa hai, I made few decision which might not be turning the way I wanted and this has caused a prolonged era of depression resulting in lack of my humourous instict, sense of enjoyment and feeling of writing something...

Aik mustaqil jang si chal rehi hai mere mai, kia kerun kia na kerun, sentiments, emotions, relationships, economics, future prospects, sub kuch hi blur sa hota ja reha hai. I apply for new jobs everyday laiken don't persue them later isliye kuch nahi badalta, mere say itnay logo ko itni expectations hain, mere managers ko at work, mere parents ko at home and people in trusted circle, kis kis ko kaise khush kerun....buht masla hai yeh to :(

Well socha to buht kuch likhne ko, roz hi koi na koi baat to zaror aati hai zehn mai k isper likhna chahiyeh, laiken phir wohi, I just don`t get enough time to think about myself anymore, shaed k mai khudi nahi chahta sochna, kion k jab sochnay bethta houn to dil kerta hai k sub kuch aik din mai hi change hojaye, jo k mumkin nahi.

Abhi mai gher per betha hun, 3:30 pm wednesday, one day to go for ramadan, hah last year tek i would have known islamic dates as well and would have sent Ramadan greetings to most of my friends etc etc and this year till yesterday I wasn't sure when the blessed month is going to start, how things are changed, it is certainly not going the way I wanted...

4 Comments:

Anonymous Mariam said...

I hope everything works out for you. You have mentioned about parents', employer's, and zee trusted circle's expectations. Let me ask you a question: what do YOU want? Is it different from or similar to what others expect? You may have thought about this already and decided not to write it out. But my best wishes & prayers are with you.

Thu Sep 13, 02:36:00 am GMT+3  
Anonymous Mariam said...

Ab "buss aik aur post" bhi ho jayay to kya hi baat ho :O

Sun Sep 23, 05:49:00 am GMT+3  
Blogger BlackRose said...

You have to remember..you cannot fulfill everyones expectations....

You cannot possibly keep everyone happy all the time...

And if its contentment you are looking for then you need to start following your heart.. rather than always thinking so logically and following your mind about whats right or not ..

Sometimes theres no right or wrong.. either your hearts in it or not.. and it seems it isnt from everything you have written.... points towards you not being happy and satisfied about where you are at the moment....

So... change it....or accept it....

Wishin u loadsa happiness and a more stable state of mind..(yes im sayin ur crazy).... :p haha :$ ok thats mean ..

what? it was all too nice.. :(

Tue Sep 25, 09:42:00 pm GMT+3  
Blogger Bushra said...

I agree wiv blackrose..
Itz ya choice to c whether the cup is half full or half empty. Itz not the big things in life that matter the most. Itz the little things that can make us happy & bring us up when we r down. Just like when ya see a butterfly flitter around a flower. Dont worry 2 much about what tomorrow will bring. Just enjoy life and live! For no one, except God, knows what ill happen in the future. So why bother worrying?..

or ksi bat se farq na pery tu mra soch loo(H) ... definetly theek hojana hy:P


MAY ALLAH give ya happiness & satisfaction in ya life... Ameen

Mon Nov 12, 12:12:00 am GMT+3  

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