Monday, March 26, 2007

dubai update

Waise kitni strange baat hai k I dont have any favourite songs for any occasion, udaas houn ya khush kabhi yaad nahi aata k konsa song mujhey pasand tha :S achanak abhi dosrey room mai "Awaara pan banjara pan, aik khala hai seenay mai" song chala to mujhey khayal aaya k how much i used to listen to this song but I don't anymore.

Aaj phir din koi khaas acha nahi guzra, aik well done ki email to aayi hai about presentation ki laiken saath aik aur bad news bhi k we not moving to separate place yet as promised, ab reasons chahay kuch bhi houn and i will be getting a sharing room with other person in the same house as they all live in, laiken sachi this is not what i want, its not just about what i want or the kind of place i would like to live its buss I know myself, mujhey chain hi nhi aaye ga and jab tek mai thiek feel nahi kerounga obviously it gona affect my tendency to work and subsay ghalt baat yeh hai k abhi sochtay yehi khayal aaya k mujhey job k barey mai negative feelings kion horehi hain, shaed reason yehi hai k mai abhi tek settle nahi huwa, and jahan abhi reh reha hun wahan mujhey settle hona bhi nahi hai , i simply don't want to, reasons chahay hazaar houn, hard work, initial time, need to achieve something bla bla bla sachi baat to yeh hai k mai buht acha bhi nahi hun , kuch batoun per compromise hosakta hai laiken har baat per to nahi.

Haan maanta houn k yahan aanay ka decision mera hi tha, is company mai kaam kernay ka bhi where i knew k situation thori complex hogi coz mera boss mera dost hai laiken pata nahi probably i am just not clear about the situation and for a person like me, ambiguity is the worse scenario, I always used to plan for each and everything I have something in my mind, few fallback plans bla bla chahay kabhi amal kia ho ya nahi , isdafa when it was such a big decision of my life, I just trusted my mate...... okay im blank now, mai gila kerna hargiz nahi chahta and neither that gona help if i'll start blaming my own decisions, laiken i just HOPE k things go bit better.....better the way I want.

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2 Comments:

Blogger Mariam said...

Hang in there, inshaAllah zee situation will improve & you will feel better about it :)

Mon Mar 26, 10:56:00 pm GMT+3  
Blogger Tauqeer said...

aho

Tue Mar 27, 11:26:00 am GMT+3  

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